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The Dirty Little S Word: Part 1, When the Rubber Meets the Road

Biblical Submission: A Practical Example

Sometimes when the Lord wants to get a point across He places us at a crossroads.  We know enough, prayed enough and read enough.  Now it’s time to put on our big girl panties and apply what He has taught us.

In 2012 I was still working out what submission meant to me when the most stressful of events happened to us.

The call at roughly 12:30 on that hot Friday afternoon in August changed our lives forever.  In my shock and natural bent toward being a fixer and organizer I wanted to rush home to help, save and see for myself the devastation the a fire can do to a home. Not only that but the incredible fact that a car had hit the house was even more bizarre. I had to see this and fix this as quickly as possible.

I wanted to go.  I would have left the camper sit, our friends and family behind and I would have left. What race? What tickets? Who cared at that point, our house and the majority of our possessions were being swallowed up by flames.

The problem was we were 10 hours away. Talk about feeling helpless.

The campground with its lush green grass became a little vacuum of space where my husband and I tried to process what was happening via relay from family and emergency personnel at the scene and begin to piece together what necessary steps we needed to take.  Three hours felt like 10 minutes as I tried to make contact with my family, our pastor, my boss and also figure out how we’d get home in the quickest amount of time possible.

But my husband, my practical, mostly level-headed husband said we weren’t leaving.

Wait, what? Not leaving?

Yep, that’s what I said.  Not leaving.  Suddenly the little vacuum I was in burst wide open as I realized that he was serious and that we had to do life for 2 days until I could put eyes on this crazy mess.

Talk about a moment of do or die for submitting. 

But with the facts, laid out as they were, there was nothing to rush back for at that point.  Brad spoke to both state trooper and fire chief and there wasn’t much to rush home to. Most major things (the dogs, the cash, the guns and the mounts) were being removed by our relatives and church family who were on the scene almost immediately after the fire.  It makes me teary eyed thinking how blessed we are to have such wonderful family. Had we started packing at 3 pm we would not have arrived home until roughly 1 am Saturday morning with nowhere to stay and nothing to do beside stare at the charred, smoldering remains of half of our house. To add insult to injury they would have been smoldering wet rains as rain was forecasted for Saturday into Sunday.

Practically speaking, there was nothing we could do until Monday morning when clean up and recovery would begin.

Even still, this was a moment I will never forget.  I stood there, almost seeing the words “We aren’t leaving,” come out of his mouth feeling as though I was watching a movie rather than living my life.  It was not easy in that moment.  Every part of my flesh wanted to scream at him.

Could family we were with take me home, would they leave? I could get a plane ticket, maybe my mom would come for me?  Thoughts raced through my head as fast at the cars on the track qualifying for Saturday’s race.

Stand By Your Man

Brad took some flack from family and friends for not leaving but it was the right call.  Not only was it right but I was faced several times with the opportunity to dog him or stand beside him on his decision.  I had to make the right call every time.  

A few people suggested that he was being selfish and not thinking about me but this wasn’t about ME. This was about us.  This was our life, our family, our home, our marriage – we are one.  The Lord showed me very clearly in those few moments after he utters the words “we’re not leaving,” that this was a pivotal decision for me:

The decision to choose to submit to Brad’s decision, to be okay with it and even to defend it later. And trust me, I was asked many times.

Biblical submission is not easy sometimes but it is right.  So why is so hard for us to submit?  Why was it so hard for friends and family to wrap their heads around why I did not scream at the top of my lunges, get made and buy a plane ticket?

Why is submit such a dirty little word?

Please join me for part 2 as we look at why submit is so wrong and what we can do about it.

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  1. […] I shared my ultimate test of submission to my husband in Part 1 of Biblical Submission.  Today let’s dive in a bit further. […]

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