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The Fret Files: Breaking the Lie of Worry

breaking the lie of worry

As a self-professed (and recovering) chronic worrier I used to spend hours “thinking” about stuff.  The problem was it was stuff I couldn’t change and stuff I shouldn’t have been thinking about in the first place.

As I mentioned in part 1, I thought worry was responsible.  I believed the lie that said I needed to figure things out, that I was responsible for what was going to happen that I needed to get things right, in order and done on my own accord.

I, I, I, me, me, me.  So selfish and so wasteful.

In my longing to be a responsible, mature adult I was behaving like a selfish, immature child.

But the Lord answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things; but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.” ~ Luke 10:41-42 (emphasis mine)

What was Martha doing?  Jesus, who knew her heart even before she spoke, said she was “worried and bothered.”  Remember our definition of worry:

” to torment oneself with or suffer from disturbing thoughts; fret.”

Let’s go back to verse 40… “But Martha was distracted with all her preparations; and she came up to Him and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone? Then tell her to help me.” 

Martha’s focus was on the physical world around her and selfishly was fretting over what needed done. In this case Christ Jesus our Lord was sitting IN HER HOUSE and she was worried about preparations.  Whaaat?

How often do we fret over housework and put that above spending time with our family. Or fret over money rather than doing something to change the situation?  Do we fret over tragic events or do we pray and seek the Lord?

When we selfishly worry about something we are taking away the power of God in our lives.  We worry because we think we can control. In reality we cannot control but we can (and should) rely on the one who can control, who knows the beginning from the end.

Do you worry or do you cast that worry to the Lord and remember that He is in control?  If you’re a chronic worrier like I was, I urge you to ask the Lord to show you what you worry about – from the little things like “what’s for dinner” to the big things like “will we be okay financially” to the strongholds of absurd things like “what if my husband gets hit by a car on the way home from work” or “what if he is cheats on me.” I can say that in love because I used to have those thoughts.

They were nagging, tormenting thoughts that had me in constant worry.

Mole Hills to Mountains – A Striking Revelation on Worry

Let’s go back to the definition of worry once more.  Besides what’s above worry also means this:

  • to seize, especially by the throat, with the teeth and shake or mangle, as one animal does another.
  • to harass by repeated biting, snapping, etc.

That is exactly what the enemy is doing when he throws real worry in our faces.  Did you ever worry to the point where you were choked up and your chest was heavy? As I mentioned I used to have nagging thoughts of worry especially about my husband. When he worked night shift I worried that he was cheating on me to the point of driving to his work once to see if his truck was there.  I would stay up half the night and then be a mess for work the next day.  The enemy had me by the throat.

Worry is a lie meant to take our focus off of Christ and His power and onto ourselves and our problems (small, medium or large).  See, the enemy doesn’t care that it’s a silly little issue like what side dish you’ll serve with dinner. If he can use that to throw you into worry, steal your peace and take your focus off Christ he will.  He’s good at helping you turn your mole hills into mountains.  I believe this is the example we see from the above passage in Luke.  We may think it is absurd to worry about crescent roles over Christ but how many times do we do it? We worry about stuff we can’t control and end up loosing our focus.

When I finally put two and two together and realized that worry was a tool of the devil something clicked for me.  I realized worry was never going to end well, because nothing Satan does ends well. Sometimes I catch myself falling into worry and sometimes the Lord reminds me during our talks that I’m taking back worry.  But at least we catch it quickly and it doesn’t linger for days or weeks.

If you’re following along from part one you have been paying attention to how many times you use the word “worry.”  Now, ask the Lord to show you what real worry you are carrying.  What worries are you holding on to (small, medium or large).  In part three we’ll look at how we stay out of worry by diving into some scriptures.

Do you carry nagging worries? What worries are on your heart more often than not?

You my also want to read part 1 – Worry is Overused and Unnecessary and come back for more from the Fret Files in the near future.

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  1. Thank you for this reminder. I can be a worrier, and why? God is in control of everything, and He loves me. I can rest secure in His love.

  2. This really resonated with me. I, too, am a chronic worrier – not necessarily fearful, but just “thinking too much.” We recently had someone in our family commit a horrible sin, and I’ve obsessed ever since over what I should say or do to show them that they need to repent – and since I was thinking about how I could “help,” it never occurred to me that this was the same thing as worry! But it is…it’s been biting and snapping at me, to the point that it’s almost all I think about. That cannot be of God! Those definitions of how animals “worry” really puts it in perspective. It’s larger than just clear fears!

    • Yes, the other thinkers of the world, me included are often worriers who don’t know they worry. I’m glad this struck a chord. I pray the Lord shows you what He wants you to do instead of “thinking” about the situation nonstop. As far as advice, I would pray that the Lord make it clear to you what you are to do. The bible says we are to approach another believer along with witnesses but I don’t know if this family member is a believer. Ask Him to make it clear if and when you should talk to them that that His words flow through you and mercy abounds. The last thing you want to do is condemn.



  1. […] you’ve been following along in the series you know the mess worry can cause in your life and hopefully you’ve learned how to identify it and stay out of worry. […]

  2. […] that night – something like counseling, but the goal is to identify and loose strongholds and receive God’s Spirit in their place. That was a long night of […]

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